How to Empower Yourself via Positive Thinking

There are many of us with a positive mindset, we are the ones who are able to see around a problem and still be smiling when we have faced challenges along the way. Our mind is a powerful tool that we often do not fully utilise. A strong mind allows action rather than inaction. Allows us to be adaptable in different situations. Allows us to around situations and tasks.

A positive mental attitude can be made into a habit.

The habits you create, good or bad, voluntary or involuntary; this is established by one’s mental attitude. Attitudes and habits that an individual carry out will be the deciding factor in the way one would like to move forward. It is interesting how certain types of people gravitate towards a group of people. Most often, we attract people of similar mindset, goals, ambitions and also social standing. To breed the qualities and attributes you hold as a person those will be reflected in the peer group you are surrounded in. Unfortunately, we are coming to a time where I see that I am surrounded by quite a few negative forces. There are many that are contradictory to that; as they are the ones succeeding and pushing the boundaries that bit further.

Is it exciting and challenging to force an invisible boundary around yourself?

The success you make is driven from your positivity. It is not just a mindset but a way of life. I felt that I have been losing this for many reasons. I am constantly trying to manage multiple projects/tasks, trying to be a force in all aspects of my life; professionally and personally. To re-iterate to people out there, the tasks we carry out do not have to host a monetary value. Success is derived from enabling yourself to be positive and allows growth mindset to enter your life. This does not mean that every task will hold a pound or Dollar symbol at the end of it.

I am going to run the race. I am going to win the race. I am going to make it happen!

We need to take control of our minds. We need to take control of our future and feel the power within our fingertips. There will be jealousy from others in the ones who succeed. There will be reprisal that may come your way but if we act in good faith, keep within the lines and be honest to ourselves and the ones around us. Then our growth mindset may even impact others around us. To be greedy only makes you a weak person. To want to grow and give some of that to others actually helps you with your end goal; as you never know who you will end up touching and who could help later along in your journey of life.

Do you want to go through life miserable and frustrated?

To hold faith in yourself is the strongest tool that you can carry. If you want to see it as your personal weapon or your super power; than think of it like that. Embody positive strong words like belief, confidence, empowerment, focus, determination, decisiveness and many more! And build into your life. When you surround yourself with this sort of attitude you will find that you are naturally in a good mood, life will be feel different and more people will gravitate towards you. Make yourself stand out for all of the right reasons. Think that the camera is on you at all times and your moves are being watched and the moment you stop spinning that plate is the day when the whole world is watching!

Mental attitude controls, very largely, the space one occupies in life, the success one achieves, the friends one makes and the contributions ones makes to posterity. It would be no great overstatement of the truth if we said mental attitude is EVERYTHING.(You Can Work Your Own Miracles, Napoleon Hill, 1971, pg 19)

According to the Mayo Clinic, there are also many health benefits that will give you a better life via positive thinking:

  • A longer life span

  • Less stress

  • Lower rates of depression

  • Increased resistance to the common cold

  • Better stress management and coping skills

  • Lower risk of cardiovascular disease-related death

  • Increased physical well-being

  • Better psychological health

So, what are you waiting for?! What are the next steps?

  1. Start believing in yourself – only with personal confidence will you be able to strive forward

  2. Take away the fear of illness and physical pain

  3. Remove the shackles that you have imprisoned yourself in

  4. Break away from neglect. Care a little, care a lot! Show you care and you are truly passionate

  5. Recognise failures. Break away from failure and admit to it. And feel gratitude that you are able to grow from it and learn from the mistakes you have made. This has enriched your journey and the path you are undertaking

  6. Be true to yourself. Being over confident and greedy will not assist in your path. The desire of the other’s success will not land in your lap nor will those same riches. Monetary value is fleeting.

  7. Educate yourself. Truly immerse yourself in learning. Be knowledgeable and shine from it.

  8. Neglect of the action you take will hinder you from moving onto the next action. One action will lead to another and sometimes it is the smallest of actions that can lead to failure that you do not foresee

  9. Devote time to the cause. To the action. To the task. To being nurturing. To presenting in the best manner. To baking the best bread. To being the best you can!

  10. Impatience will bring you failure.

  11. Be in gratitude of the riches made. By giving some of your time, wealth or anything else. Be humble. Riches do not bring happiness and for some it may only be fleeting.

  12. To believe you must be willing to give rather than always receive.

  13. Neglect in others will cause neglect in yourself.

There are seven fears to overcome:

  1. The Fear of Poverty

  2. The Fear of Criticism

  3. The Fear of Ill Health and Physical pain

  4. The Fear of Loss of Love

  5. The Fear of Loss of Liberty

  6. The Fear of Old Age

  7. The Fear of Death

We all need to overcome the fears above to be able to move forward.

The brain holds Limitless Power. We hold infinite intelligence at our fingertips. To be able to conquer. To exceed, to be able demonstrate warmth and love. Play the words in your mind like a mantra. Shout it out to yourself. Immerse yourself and carry out actions that will assist you in the journey. Surround yourself with like-minded people and allow yourself to grow!

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Personality Identity and Reflections of the Self

First and foremost, I would like to thank you for coming back and reading my entries about personal development. The site is about how we can grow the mind and create stronger identities for ourselves using growth mindset. I hope that I can assist you on this ever evolving journey and together we can keep moving forward and evolving as individuals. I am certain that together we can make an impact in our lives internally and externally.

Please note, these entries will be reflected more as chapters or singular entries that link to the previous entry to ensure a continuous theme.

The previous entry discusses my personality and breaking norms. I would like to delve further the ideology behind the personality, concepts of the self and how the self is reflected in society today and around us. I believe that you have been given an idea of how my personality has formed and what has contributed to the personality I am today. There is motivations, values and beliefs from my parents and society around me. The era I was born in and the influences that affect my upbringing has a large part to the personality I hold today. Living in time where I am juxtaposed with the social norms around me and then socio-cultural norms that are created by the home environment that I had resided in whilst I was growing up. When norms and boundaries are broken then your world and identity is set upon axis that is irregular to the rest of the world. To keep up the pace with this journey you are challenged further, pulled and prodded that much further and there has been vessels of negativity felt along the way due to this as social norms have been broken.

This leads me nicely to discuss what is the concept of the self, how is the self reflected and personality traits of us as individuals.

The concept of the self?

The self can be defined like a concentric circle with many layers that then make one individual person. Each of the circle represent a particular element of your values, beliefs, attitudes and then also the social, economic and cultural aspects that you have begun your life with too. In addition, to this I have not spoken about broken or traumatic families, where the family life have had but a from happy upbringing. Such as, families with a parent suffering from alcohol problems, or physical abuse, or single parent families are just some of the contributing factors that create a fragmented mind and self. Norms that one is use to is broken and expectations from ourselves do not equal up to social norms that have been set in place.

Diagram of the concept of Self:

Circle image

KEY:

Yellow – The core of yourself – The base of the identity

Green – Values

Orange – Attitudes

Red – Emotional aspects of the self

Blue – Psychological aspects of the self

From the above diagram you can see that the self requires various elements to create a whole self. The self requires all of different elements to form one individual. They will most likely merge together and extreme situations may bring out certain elements. The sense of self and the awareness created is from life experiences and the awareness that you create yourself. For instance, I spoke with a young graduate today and he showed a calm manner in his tone of voice and English used. However, his body language spoke something differently, as he he had twitchy legs and he non-verbally communicating feeling of unease with the situation that he was in speaking to myself. His nervousness stemmed from him being a young postgraduate who is new to our department. He also showed his dis-interest in running quite clearly although he affirmed otherwise. Here is a prime example of nerves and trying very hard to not show them and non-verbal language gave away to what he was feeling on the inside. Or, the poor young man was just nervous speaking with me; I hope not at all.

Personality and characteristics that define our individual features:

Our personalities are defined so early on that the individual characteristic’s to ourselves can become invisible to us; if we do not analyse and identify ourselves with the personality held. There are strong representations of the self that are projected onto others and over a period of time we hopefully quickly come to recognise the pro’s and con’s of tat the personality we hold. Further information about your personality can found by taking the Enneagram test. I have found that personality quiz to be accurate to my personality characteristics and the attributes that I hold.

To take the quiz, please follow the link https://www.eclecticenergies.com/enneagram/testThe Enneagram system;

The Enneagram is a personality typing system that consists of nine different types. Everyone is considered to be one single type, although it can be that one person has more than one trait. It is undetermined whether the traits are genetically provided at birth.

The nine types (or “enneatypes”, “ennea” means “nine”) are universally identified by the numbers 1 to 9. These numbers have a standard way of being placed around the Enneagram symbol. Enneagram authors have attached their own individual names to these numbers. On this site the type names by authors Riso and Hudson are used. They are:

  1. The Reformer
  2. The Helper
  3. The Achiever
  4. The Individualist
  5. The Investigator
  6. The Loyalist
  7. The Enthusiast
  8. The Challenger
  9. The Peacemaker

Some of the personality characteristic traits can be very similar to other personalities but there is a quite difference between a healthy personality and an unhealthy personality. The characters can be the same but the factors affecting that personality can be more than just neurotic and of course very troubling. To ensure that your personality is best matched with yourself each personality has a wing that is adjacent to their personality trait that is of their own. For instance, I am a no 3 – The Achiever and my wing is of the The Helper.

The spirit is the true self, not that physical figure which can be pointed out by your finger.” Cicero

In conclusion:

Personalities may already be created by the childhood factors that you were born with. The social norms and then the values and attidude’s that came with your upbringing. The self can become easily fragmented by trauma and negative socio-economical aspects and many other negative contributing factors. The self is a myriad of attributes that work in different situations in different ways and actions can be enhanced in extreme instances or emotion dis-balance.

The self is evolving and growing this is led by the experiences we have had and also the people we socialise or mix with. How we want to determine and extract the ‘true self’ is purely dependent on how you wish to take the journey in life and how you wish to either improve or pull a part the self you hold to better strengthen what you hold. By taking personality quizes and learning about your personality further should assist you in your growth mindset to better accomplish the goals you have set yourself.

References:

https://opentextbc.ca/socialpsychology/chapter/the-cognitive-self-the-self-concept/

https://www.eclecticenergies.com/enneagram/introduction

How to Discover Your Inner Self

I would like to openly discuss with you on this occasion the subject of the ‘inner self’ and the construction of our personality. Personalities are intricate aspects of ourself and they the core of how we operate. There are many layers to one person and again upbringing and childhood circumstances play a large part of the formation of an individual’s personality.

I am going to openly discuss myself here for there to be an understanding of how I work and how perceptions of society and upbringing has affected me to this day. I will openly discuss myself so that I hope you can delve into yourself and bring out the strengths and build upon those. To be dissipate the norms and the excess negative energy will help you in re-focusing your core. In determining your requirements from life and achieving the goals that you have set. May this be in your personal or professional life; as the two marry together. There is not one without the other. How you personify yourself is very important; as we are impacting other lives around us but you we may not be aware of this. To be aware of your true self and the others around you can take a lifetime but if you gain this spiritual journey you are moving towards the goal.

A little history about myself and where my identity and personality has arisen from. I am Bangladeshi of descent originating from Dhaka but born in Narayangonj and moved to the UK when I was one years old. My life here was led by one strict mother who is a strong believer in Islam and not so strict father who had a liberal mindset for an Bangladeshi Asian. My ethnicity brought on a few of my own dilemmas especially as I did not look typically Asian of descent (partially Arabic of origin) but also my upbringing was truly quite different than other typical Asian families out there.

There is strong research that indicates that your upbringing plays a strong part on your identity and the personality you lead in later life. There is quite difference between a happy and sad childhood, to other factors involved when being raised by parents. I disclose information about mine for you to get an understanding of what I am discussing. The Howlader family has been led by strong female figures how often took on the role of what the stereotypical male would encompass. Already, from a young age the gender norms have been changed. My mother married my father at the age 16.5 years old, she took the role of wife, daughter in law, mother and head of a family. She was the glue that held it together my father was hardly at home with the restaurant business and also being a translator for the immigration.

When the roles are shifted you are juxtaposition of the norms, as they are broken. My mother may have taken on multiple roles and responsibilities as they were required but due to this; her temperament as a mother was never the best. She was cold, aloof and ambitious. She was maternal are rare times and her expectations were set at a bar that near impossible. My elder sister of 7.5 years was also another strong figure; first in line and the world was taken with her. Without going into too much detail I also have two younger brothers each three years younger than the 37 years I am now. My younger brothers and I had a close relationship due to them being more similar in age to me. This also meant most of my friends were my brother’s friends, we spent our childhood playing football in the park and video games. This you may even find rather surprising. There is an importance I am trying to bring out here that links back to my personality – I led a happy childhood but there many other factors that shook my equilibrium to led me the person I am today.

What are norms and cultural identities when they are misplaced?

When the norms of society are juxtaposed you get someone like me. Sometimes, I fit very well in a conversation, in life and a situation. My beliefs and values of strong parenting and loving parents have created a sense of wholeness but this wholeness is never complete. Strong women mean that maternal traits are often dropped and a more musculine approach is ttaken in life and also bringing up your own children. The emotions you feel become more clinical and you piecemeal emotions to be able to deal with them; if you do deal with them at all.

How do we harness our personality and pull out the strengths?

To feel the inner beauty that your personality offers you then you need to become accepting of what has happened previously in your life. We are all seeking the same childhood disposition but in different manners – this is to seek love, happiness and attention. For this to happen, you need to begin loving yourself first. Many of us had experienced things in our past but it has we take the negativity or that posistive and utitlise the growth mindset to bring forward and takes your destiny in your hands.

It is now time to take a step out of your physical body. Spirituality of the soul and heart can be reached if you allow yourself to see beyond the material obstacles we set ourselves in lives. For some, this will always be purely nonsensical and they will not understand why it is necessary to take these actions in life. This just means that are not at that path in their life; where they are seeking something more and they are not really seeing the beauty of what is around them.

What does this mean for myself? I have touched in various elements of personality and upbringing but I have not really taken a part what personalities consist of. I have not spoken about human emotions that make up a person; which is love, hurt, anger, passion, sympathy, empathy, disgust, happiness, sadness, contempt and fear. Rationality is derived from the emotions we feel. This is why a mass murderer can easily come to mind; as they hold all the extreme emotions with a fragmented childhood and broken mind.

What about attraction to others? Personality types attract similar personality types?

Stacy Lynn Harp, a clinically trained marriage and family therapist in Tennessee, believes most of us attract people we have things in common with. “Likeness attracts likeness. It’s actually a myth that opposites attract,” Harp told Medical Daily in an email. “Those who are seeking people who are similar understand that long term compatibility is more likely with someone who is like themselves.”

Healthy and happy relationships will grow and foster when couples share the same values and beliefs. When communication is used openly and upbringings are similar. I am not saying that social status does not matter in this equation because this can also play a part; but without providing further supplementary information I cannot provide to me feedback on this.

The people we connect ourselves to are a strong interpretation of ourself and how the values and beliefs of that group are shared. There is a common goal or glue holding the circle together to keep the circle flowing. Once, someone changes their perception or values or beliefs than they become alien to that group as they are not functioning with the group norms that are set in place. So, how we select friends is very pivotal in our perception of ourselves and how we are established or move forward in life.

I have not spoken about the other aspects of personality; which is honesty and integrity. We live in a world where it is easy to hide behind different guises. Facebook, Instragram, Twitter and all of the others give us a vessel to communicate to the external world without different guises that can be true and false. We are allowing the view us in certain ways and if you are not serial PI (private investigator) like myself; you are easily believe the information firsthand of what is given. Trust given out too freely and then you can be betrayed in what you see or hear. This is the cynical part of myself speaking if you are to seek inner peace and rely on your spirituality then you could debate that is one not proven fault until one has created a fault in the first place. This I am trying to take on further but past experiences lead me to be wary and this you should; as deception is easy with the world wide web.

I hope you have enjoyed this update. The discussion about personal identity; I think I could discuss the topic much longer but I will break it down into chapters for you to want to come back and read again very soon!

Discovering Your Personality

For many years now I have been storing a few books regarding the human psyche and several self-development books. I came to the decision that it was time to take those books out of storage. Many of the books I had actually given away due to the lack of space, thankfully I have kept some of the really good ones.

I am truly excited to inform you about the one of the books I have begun reading, I am sure there are a lot of readers out there who know about The Enneagram of Personality. The Wisdowm of Enneagram is a complete guide to Psychological and Spiritual Growth for Personality Types by Don Richard Riso and Russ Hudson. For those who are not familiar with this, The Enneagram refers to nine different types of personalities an individual can hold and the determining factors behind this and how this has been contributed to us. This includes the spiritual growth that you would or have undertaken and are currently undertaken.

I feel like I have picked up this particular book at a crucial point in my life.  From all of the books that I could have read; I selected this one as I feel that the spiritual journey I am undertaking has led me to this particular book. There are various elements of the book I would like discuss with you but the process will take little longer than some of my other entries as there many topics that will be covered.  Also, one topic often stems to several other topics that are of interest.

For now, I will leave you with some information about Sufism; the inward spiritualism of Islam.

Sufism is a school for the actualization of divine ethics. It involves an enlightened inner being, not intellectual proof; revelation and witnessing, not logic. By divine ethics, we are referring to ethics that transcend mere social convention, a way of being that is the actualization of the attributes of God.” (http://www.nimatullahi.org/what-is-sufism/sufism-defined/)

I leave you with a poem from Rumi.

Longing is the core of mystery.
Longing itself brings the cure.
The only rule is, Suffer the pain.

Your desire must be disciplined,
and what you want to happen
in time, sacrificed.

(Rumi. The Essential Rumi, Coleman Marks)

What I have read so far of Sufism has truly touched me deeply. I am Muslim from birth but never the teaching were explicitly taught to me. Religion is taken upon us in several guises and for myself it is purely a moral guide to keep strong values and beliefs. After reading Sufism; I feel that my parents as Muslims have taught this to me innately but I am a little disappointed in how they have not really brought Sufism alive as it deserves to be understood.  I will explore this further another time; as I am truly quite taken with it. In the meantime, I wish you a fantastic Monday and an exceptional start to the week.

Failure’s and Successes

It has only been one day since, I last uploaded my last blog entry – The Power to Bring Change into Your Lives. Once, I have written a blog entry I find it very hard to let go of the topic and it generally reverberates in my mind for quite some time. I spoke openly about Failure‘s and Successes in my last blog entry but only briefly. In this entry, I would like to expand on the topic further and hopefully illustrate to you that you failure is not failure if you make it into a success.

Here are a few examples of famous people out there:

Henry Ford – His first two companies failed. He went bankrupt five times!

Steven Speilberg – Rejected from a prestigious film school three times. The same school now has a building named after him.

Stephen King – His first novel Carrie was rejected 30 times before it was published.

Michael Jordan – He did not make the basketball team as he is 5ft11 and and this is considered too short for basketball players. Also, he was informed that he lacked the skills to play the game.

What is failure?

  • For some failure comes from financial loss

  • There was neglect or omission of expected or required action taken on your part

To fail can effect people in different ways. From the above examples, you can see that success was not driven on the first instance. Success can not always be quantified. Is it measurable? It to an athlete; every second counts and this is what makes the difference.

Failure should help you realise, where your gaps are. There should be a learning process; there should a better process in place for the next instance. Failure will stay a failure; if there are no learning’s and no improvements for the next time round. This means that this sort of failure will continue and after several attempts of a refined process that you should consider an alternative venture, task, project or hobby.

Here is a personal example in regards to languages. I am master of a sentence or two in multiple languages but not a connoisseur in any particular language. My mother tongue is Bengali and this I can just about passable. Hindi or Urdu is more broken or conversationalist; so at least this some resemblance to being able to speak freely in a foreign language that is not my own mother tongue. However, that I do very poorly even though I do speak ‘Shadoo basho’ – standard pronunciation of the Bengali vernacular. Now, the English language I have mastered fully and this is the one language that I am truly superb at. My point being; I have come to an understanding to myself that I am will never be a connoisseur of any particular language. Those Arabic lessons I took at the best institute in language and learning how to say that ‘the pen is on a table next to the wardrobe’well that really didn’t help me much in life!

What will YOU do to turn FAILURE into a success?

Did you know that many people imagine success in their mind. They visualise it and they desire it like it is their first only love in their lives. So, here is some role play for you…

Take a scenario in your head. Let’s say for myself it’s a run to the park and back. I imagine the circuit in my head before I have run it. I imagine it. I see where I slow down and then I can see where I will get tired. Then, I think about my timings and how my legs and arms will feel and how I will move them. Very quickly, I am so familiar with the circuit that the process is not daunting any more. And now in very little time I have increased my speed and my distance with very little trying.

What does Success Look Like?

Success comes from a sense of achieving a task. There is a moment or longer of euphoria, which is caused by the waves of the brain chemical dopamine. This initially produces euphoria turning into pleasure or excitement and intense feeling of happiness or a similar emotion. Euphoria of cause can be caused naturally or with the help of certain drugs. However, I am here to discuss the natural euphoric moments that does not require drugs and were a feeling of success may have derived from. Some ways natural euphoria can be experienced is by aerobic exercise, laughter, listening to music, rewards and social situations. There is also neurological or neuropsychiatric disorders such as mania, bi-polar and then also romantic love, sexual responses can all cause the induction of euphoria.

I am not going to go into the psychological aspects of euphoria on this occasion; as this really quite an extensive topic that require multiple topics for it to be covered fully. I have quite an interest in the methodology of the operations of the brain and how emotively we work as individuals. So, I might touch upon this subject on another occasion. For now, we keep to the topic of Failure and Successes.

From the above, we understand that to succeed your brain has sent positive signals to your brain and you are feeling in a state of positivity. Now, we also know that this is not an everlasting feeling and that the feeling dissipates very quickly, you are seeking that sense of achievement again. This can be one of the biggest stumbling blocks for some individuals as if you have only experienced success in your life; you have no idea what failure looks like. So, how can you accept failure?

How to succeed by failing:

  • The want and the need to learn and to want to make improvements

  • To be able to value other human beings

  • Over-striver’s will avoid failure as they cannot fathom what to do if suffered from failure

  • When you avoid failure you are making excuses and procrastinating and you are not actually participating

What you do not want to do:

  • If you choose not to participate and decide you are unwilling or immobile then you will come to a point where internalised failure will self-fulfil itself.

What I am trying to conclude from this entry and other entries is that success is driven from the core. To succeed you need to understand failure to not have anything or to feel at your lowest and then pick yourself up and then try again. And then try again and then carry it out again. Along the way getting your hands dirty and making a lot enemies but also making a lot of friends.

Those who are with you when you succeed will disappear when you fail.

But those who stand by your side when you fail and you are emotionally spent; those are the ones that will be by your side in the good, bad, ugly and fun times.

I hope you took something from this and I wish you the best of luck in your endeavours.

References:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Euphoria

The Power to bring Change into Your Lives

In the last blog entry, I discussed the topic of ‘Growth Mindset’. How your mind can grow if you are willing to be open, flexible and willing to accept failure.    Repeat this.  Repeat this again and continue with this circle effect and before you know it’Growth Mindset’ has taken you over and you created the Power to change your life.

For ones who do not know me. I have decided to embark on a journey to learn more, to push boundaries that I would have normally frightened me and to enrich others along the way. To be open and to stay honest to myself and the others around me. I hope along my journey; I hope I am able to offer you some insight and that you are not alone and there are others on this journey with you and they are also experiencing setbacks and successes.  Together, we can make this a more rewarding learning process.

What was my pivotal moment? How did I decide to bring on Change in my life? What Am I doing to ensure that I am staying in control of situations?

To bring on a change you need to either seek self enlightenment or be driven to a point of what you are doing is just not working anymore.  You have had an epiphany, a moment where you feel enlightenment that your direction you are seeking has been shown.    I have come to that point.  I have been informed by many in my team that I give too much of myself helping others and not enough time concentrating on myself.  To be honest, it is easier sometimes helping another and then not concentrating on your own flaws or imperfections or areas where you feel that you require self-improvement.  It is easier to keep your head in the sand…  

 

There was another driving factor  which has slowly crept up on me over the past six months or so.  I am starting to feel that my brain is not challenged.  I am not being challenged and I am not learning.  I am not moving forward and this is quite a large underlying problem to myself.  Power from within can only come when you acknowledge the problem at hand.  

This makes me think of the Stanford Marshmallow Test. This is an experiment carried out early in the 1960’s on children aged 4 to 6 when they were offered one treat if they did not wait and then two marshmallows if they waited for a period of time. This was also a strong indicator of how that child carried out their lives thereafter. The ones who could not wait were often the impatient and were bored much quicker. The children who could wait indicated they would receive higher study scores, lower body mass index and they could steer themselves away from gratifying themselves instantly in the moment and wait out for the larger prize at the end.

How does the Marshmallow Test correlate to myself? Can I wait to eat two marshmallows or am I destined to eat just the one immediately. Well, I love marshmallows; so I am not sure if I can wait?! I think perhaps a few years ago I may not have been able to wait. Something has changed in me that I can find that end result more rewarding; although I cannot stop being anymore impatient than before.  

Creating Change means being dedicated.  Visualise your goal and be in love with it!

How can I bring change into my life?

  • Change needs to be wanted and become an everyday part of your life
  • You need to trust and believe in yourself to take a step in a different direction
  • For some the steps will be small. From trying a different route home or trying a different destination. Or just taking more control of a situation than they normally would. Or just saying no over yes
  • Seek a positive role model in your life. I found that there have not been many role models that I could strive towards and I wanted to change that and become a mentor myself within the work place environment
  • Be connected with individuals who are a positive impact on you. A strong network is required and you do not people who are not on your side
  • Join groups where you can meet like minded people
  • Carry this out in a circle. Each time try to make it better and then carry it again and again until it becomes second nature

What am I doing to stay in control of my situations?

  • Think about your goals on a daily occurrence
  • Dream of it! Desire it and make it tangible
  • This blog is a vessel to indicate how I am trying to move forward. Commitment!
  • I will be creating some videos and putting myself in front of the screen. This is to put myself under the spot light; as I prefer to behind the scenes then in front of the camera
  • I am also going to look at gaps of where I can look at closing and I will be attending a conference about ‘A Self-Perception’ talk
  • I am particularly interested in Women in Technology as I am keen to learn about this market. I am interested in the FinTech Payment industry; as I do believe that this is way Banking will be moving forward even more and we will be moving away from traditional banking as we see it

I would like to conclude by stating that The Power to Change Your Life comes from yourself. This cannot be brought, there are not fast routes. You would need to build on yourself and take out any negative energies and people to be able to build on what you want. Sometimes, you need to be selfish to gain what you want. However, every predicament in life is completely different and each of us have different commitments that are required from ourselves.

I hope that together we can are all able to gain what we are seeking. I wish you the best of luck in your growth story.

Growth Mindset

There are two types of mindsets these are fixed and growth mindsets. I will offer you the information about growth mindset as this is way to move forward and develop on the areas you wish to improve.

Growth Mindset:

  • To grow the mind you must be willing to learn
  • Be willing to open and accept feedback
  • Learn from feedback and be willing create a plan of development
  • Effort is the key and be flexible in your approach. An athlete didn’t become a great sports person because they rested on only their talent they held. They worked hard and tried different methods to become an even better sports person
  • Embrace your mistakes and be willing to acknowledge them to be able to learn and move forward
  • Create a clear plan on how you can better. Problem solve the areas you feel are weak or what requires the most practice from yourself. Be honest in what you are capable on but be willing to move outside of the boundaries
  • Growth mindset is a circle effect, where it is constant repetition in looking at how you can move forward, become better in what you want to achieve. Achieve the goals, receive setbacks, learn from the setbacks, drive results and then begin all over again.

Quote:

In a fixed mindset students believe their basic abilities, their intelligence, their talents, are just fixed traits. They have a certain amount and that’s that, and then their goal becomes to look smart all the time and never look dumb. In a growth mindset students understand that their talents and abilities can be developed through effort, good teaching and persistence. They don’t necessarily think everyone’s the same or anyone can be Einstein, but they believe everyone can get smarter if they work at it.”

By Carol Dweck

Here is also a Ted Talk by Carol Dweck:

Carol Dweck Ted Talk

“I want to grow but I do not know how to move forward.”

How about I help you with that?  A helping hand and some planning time maybe all you need.

I would like to assist others in them achieving their growth mindset.   Moving towards your goals.  Keeping it simple and working towards it and making mistakes and learning along the way.

I would love to hear from you.

Please drop me an email at mary.panwaskar@gmail.com 

Resources used:

https://garyhorvath.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/11/USOC-MINDSETS-by-Carol-Dweck-2.09.pdf

Nigel Holmes image created for Fixed and Growth Mindset – http://www.nigelholmes.com/gallery/https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carol_Dweck